For all of you who are part of the Apple Cult.

true story

heh

fuck-yeah-tumblrs-best-posts:

justlikeaclub:

Reblog if you think that’s true.

Submitted by xpsycho

Couldn’t agree with this more.

(via unlikely-moments)

herblondness:

The American commando team that killed Osama Bin Laden in Abbottabad, Pakistan, reportedly included a dog, sparking furious speculation about the dog’s identity and discussion of the role of canines in war. Less publicized—and far more essential to top-secret U.S. military operations—are cats. (Click for More.)

(via brooklynmutt)

“Dear Internet” by Tina Fey

From PerezHilton.com/Posted by jerkstore on Wednesday, 1/21/2009, 11:21 P.M.

“In my opinion Tina Fey completely ruined SNL. The only reason she’s celebrated is because she’s a woman and an outspoken liberal. She has not a single funny bone in her body.”

“Dear jerkstore,

Huzzah for the Truth Teller! Women in this country have been over-celebrated for too long. Just last night there was a story on my local news about a “missing girl,” and they must have dedicated seven or eight minutes to “where she was last seen” and “how she might have been abducted by a close family friend,” and I thought, “What is this, the News for Chicks?” Then there was some story about Hillary Clinton flying to some country because she’s secretary of state. Why do we keep talking about these dumdums? We are a society that constantly celebrates no one but women and it must stop! I want to hear what the men of the world have been up to. What fun new guns have they invented? What are they raping these days? What’s Michael Bay’s next film going to be?

When I first set out to ruin SNL, I didn’t think anyone would notice, but I persevered because—like you trying to do a nine-piece jigsaw puzzle—it was a labor of love.

I’m not one to toot my own horn, but I feel safe with you, jerkstore, so I’ll say it. Everything you ever hated on SNL was by me, and anything you ever liked was by someone else who did it against my will.

Sincerely,

Tina Fey

P.S. You know who does have a funny bone in her body? Your mom every night for a dollar.”

I’m continually pleasantly surprised by Tina Fey. Yay for a woman with intelligence.

(via inothernews)

the20newyork:

Responsible Non-Hipsters Only. This might be discrimination, but it’s the funny kind of discrimination, right? Vinnie’s Pizza in Williamsburg posted this Help Wanted sign, then gave Gothamist an earful on why they stand  behind their hiring policy. Turns out they hired a guy from the neighborhood last year who also happened to be in a now-popular band (who isn’t in that hood?) In the months that he worked there, the employee needed time off for touring, rehab, and even managed to get arrested while working behind the counter. But he probably looked so, so cool.

-KH

[Gothamist, h/t @AlexMLeo. Photo: Petra Hanson]

heh.

(via brooklynmutt)

STEPHEN COLBERT, calling out Birthers for the racists that they really are, on The Colbert Report. (via inothernews)

Awesome! Colbert’s the man.

Now can we move on? Please?

isatsan:

norweeg:

momina:

Who wants to go apple picking this summer?

I would, but I don’t think summer is apple picking season.  The fruits haven’t grown on the trees yet.  Check Milburn’s site and see when their apple picking starts.  We can probably do berry picking if apples aren’t ripe yet.

Apple picking starts in the Fall. There are lots of berries though in the summer.

Just rode by Millburn today, and the store at least is definitely open!! I’m feeling a trip over there soon!

(via introverdict)

etsy:

(via Sweet Sprout Cupcake Toppers by mimicafeunion on Etsy)

CUTE!

(via sugaredlemon)

inothernews:

“I truly believe (America is) a lot more eccentric a nation than you give yourselves credit for.  You’re much weirder than you think you are, and I can give you proof of this.  Recently, I went to Boise, Idaho for the first, and, God willing, final time.  But there is something in Boise that I will never forget: in the center of Boise, on the main street, there’s this huge building, and on the front of the building, in gigantic yellow letter, there’s this one word, and that word is ‘LIBRARY.’  And then, there’s an exclamation mark!  And I spent hours trying to figure out what that exclamation mark was really trying to say.  Was it, ‘I know, I can’t believe Boise’s got a library either!’ …Or was it ‘LIBRARY!  Just kidding, it’s a Chuck E. Cheese’?”

— Comedian JOHN OLIVER, about the Boise Public Library.